ghIq muSchoH /Fëanor/ 'ej ghIjbe'choH. /Melkor/ 'IghmoH 'ej mej /Melkor/ 'e' ra'. jatlh, «lojmItwIjvo' yIghoS, /Mandos/ bIghHa' notqa'!» /Eä /DabwI''e' /Melkor/ HoSghaj law' Hoch HoSghaj puS; DabwI'vam qab tlhopDaq juHDaj lojmItmey SoQmoH /Fëanor/. Then hate overcame Fëanor’s fear, and he cursed Melkor and bade him be gone, saying: ‘Get thee gone from my gate, thou jail-crow of Mandos!’ And he shut the doors of his house in the face of the mightiest of all the dwellers in Eä. -- SuStel http://trimboli.name
SuStel:
klingon translation
I had a wonderful idea.. I'll translate too this passage, post it, and *then* read your translation, so as not to be influenced by it. QoghIjwIjDaq narghpu' qech pov; ghItlh 'ay'vam vImugh je, 'ej vImughta'DI', 'ej naDev vIlI'ta', mughta'ghachlIj vIlaD. vImughta'pa', mughta'ghachlIj vIlaDbe', muSIghvIpmo'. ~ qnqnqq
fse: Then hate overcame Fëanor’s fear, and he cursed Melkor and bade him be gone, saying: ‘Get thee gone from my gate, thou jail-crow of Mandos!’ And he shut the doors of his house in the face of the mightiest of all the dwellers in Eä. tlh: wa'DIch ghIj feanor, 'ach tagha' muSqu'choHmo', melkor tIchmeH 'ej mejmoHmeH HoS Suq. vaj jatlh: lojmItwIjvo' yIghoS, mandos bIghHa' notqa' ! ea nganpu''e', melkor Dun law' Hoch Dun puS; 'ach, feanor juH lojmItmeyDaq QamtaHvIS melkor, ghaHvaD lojmItmeyvam SoQmoH feanor. discussion: This is the best I could do. After finishing this, and reading your translation, I have to comment: 1st: I liked *a lot* your {Melkor 'IghmoH}. Sadly it didn't come to my mind while I was writing my version. 2nd: SuStel:
Eä DabwI''e' Melkor HoSghaj law' Hoch HoSghaj puS;
Initially I thought of using {DabwI'}, but I went with {ngan} because I didn't know which was actually closer to "dwellers". My mind decided to go with {ngan}. However, I'm puzzled with your choice of {HoSghaj}. In english, is "mighty" closer to "powerful", or closer to "greatest" ? 3rd: SuStel:
DabwI'vam qab tlhopDaq
I thought of this too, but I wondered whether the "he shut the doors of his house in the face of" was to be taken literally or metaphorically. 4th: jIH:
feanor juH lojmItmeyDaq QamtaHvIS melkor
I wondered whether I could write too: {feanor juH lojmItmeyDaq ghaHtaHvIS melkor'e'} And I still wonder whether that would be correct too.. Anyways, my american friend, I like this kind of practicing a lot, and if you'd like to continue in other small passages too, it'd be great ! ~ bnbnbnn
On 8/23/2019 1:19 PM, mayqel qunen'oS wrote:
Then hate overcame Fëanor’s fear, and he cursed Melkor and bade him be gone, saying: ‘Get thee gone from my gate, thou jail-crow of Mandos!’ And he shut the doors of his house in the face of the mightiest of all the dwellers in Eä.
tlh: wa'DIch ghIj feanor, 'ach tagha' muSqu'choHmo', melkor tIchmeH 'ej mejmoHmeH HoS Suq. vaj jatlh:
lojmItwIjvo' yIghoS, mandos bIghHa' notqa' !
ea nganpu''e', melkor Dun law' Hoch Dun puS; 'ach, feanor juH lojmItmeyDaq QamtaHvIS melkor, ghaHvaD lojmItmeyvam SoQmoH feanor.
discussion:
This is the best I could do.
After finishing this, and reading your translation, I have to comment:
1st:
I liked *a lot* your {Melkor 'IghmoH}. Sadly it didn't come to my mind while I was writing my version.
2nd:
SuStel:
Eä DabwI''e' Melkor HoSghaj law' Hoch HoSghaj puS;
Initially I thought of using {DabwI'}, but I went with {ngan} because I didn't know which was actually closer to "dwellers". My mind decided to go with {ngan}.
*ngan* works too.
However, I'm puzzled with your choice of {HoSghaj}. In english, is "mighty" closer to "powerful", or closer to "greatest" ?
It means showing great power or strength. When Tolkien says that Melkor was the mightiest of the Ainur, he means Melkor was literally the most powerful.
3rd:
SuStel:
DabwI'vam qab tlhopDaq
I thought of this too, but I wondered whether the "he shut the doors of his house in the face of" was to be taken literally or metaphorically.
I considered this carefully. /In the face of/ has an idiomatic meaning of /when confronted with/ or /despite./ But here the meaning is very nearly completely literal: Melkor is standing before the doors, and Fëanor shuts them, the shutting taking place immediately in front of Melkor's face. The English expression also includes a connotation of rudeness that doesn't necessarily come across in the Klingon unless you think about it carefully, but I don't offhand know of any Klingon expression that would elegantly express both rudeness and the shutting of a door immediately in front of someone.
4th:
jIH:
feanor juH lojmItmeyDaq QamtaHvIS melkor
I wondered whether I could write too:
{feanor juH lojmItmeyDaq ghaHtaHvIS melkor'e'}
And I still wonder whether that would be correct too..
Sure, both of those are correct. -- SuStel http://trimboli.name
participants (2)
-
mayqel qunen'oS -
SuStel