On 6/22/2021 11:21 AM, mayqel qunen'oS wrote:
en
The strength to survive must come from within. Others will always fail you. Friends, family, fellow soldiers.. In the end each person must stand alone. When in need look to the self.
tlh
tIq 'oHnIS taHmeH HoS mung'e'. reH nIbelHa'moH latlh.
In the English, /others/ is clearly not referring to the strength or the place within, so it obviously refers to other people. In your Klingon, on the other hand, it's not at all clear that *latlh* isn't referring to another heart or another origin. *nIbe'HalmoH* also seems a poor substitute for /fail you./ Maybe *reH luj DuboQbogh nuv*/people who assist you will always fail./ Or maybe he's saying the strength of others will always fail you: *reH SoHvaD luj latlh HoS*/the strength of others will always fail for you./
juppu', qorDu', latlh negh.. tagha' nIteb SIQnIS nuv.
I'd go with *tagha' nIteb SIQnIS Hoch nuv*/In the end, each person must endure alone/ or *tagha' nIteb SIQnIS nuv tlhIn*/In the end, an individual person must endure alone./
bItaHnIStaHvIS, yIbuS'eghtaH.
You've changed a /when/ to a /while/ for no reason I can see. Just as the original ties the first sentence with the last, talking about what's within, you should do the same in Klingon. *boQ DapoQDI', tIqlIj yIbuS*/When you require assistance, focus on your heart/ (the place you said was the origin of the strength to endure). -- SuStel http://trimboli.name