[tlhIngan Hol] Humerus

[Alan Anderson]

On Tue, Jun 21, 2016 at 12:12 PM, mayqel qunenoS <mihkoun at gmail.com> wrote:
> Humerus

Thank you for including an English version of what you're describing.
Without it, I doubt anyone lacking specialized training in orthopedic
terminology would recognize any of the jargon. But I think it would be
better if you separated the Klingon and English text, instead of
interleaving it. The way you are writing it now makes it difficult to
read just the Klingon without seeing the English at the same time,
keeping the reader from being confident that he or she is reading what
you wrote instead of what you meant.

> tera'Daq, DeS Hom lupongmeH Qel, mu' humerus lulo'.
> at earth, doctors in order to name the bone of the arm, use the word humerus.

This is a lot more complicated than I would have said it. My rendition
would be something like this:
{ DeS HomvaD "humerus" lupong tera' Qel } "Earth doctors name the arm
bone 'humerus'."

You might not be familiar with the usual idiom for saying how things
are named. It comes from Skybox card S27: {roD 'oHvaD juHqo' ponglu'
neH} "It [Qo'noS] is usually referred to as simply 'The Homeworld.'"


> 'ej mI' {wa'} lulo' (müller AO ghorpu'ghach buv) lulo'bogh ghIv HaqwI''e'.
> and the orthopaedic surgeons who employ the müller AO fracture
> classification use the number "one".

Why are you sprinkling parentheses through your messages lately? If
it's because you think it makes it easier to read, I can't agree. A
better way to write clearer, more understandable Klingon is to split
up complicated ideas into smaller sentences, or even just to not make
them so complicated in the first place. For example:
{ 'oHvaD <<Hom wa'>> per müller AO buv pat } "The müller AO
classification system labels it 'bone one'."

> (Hom mI' wa') tIq law' 'uS DungDaq Hoch HomDu' luSamlu'bogh tIq puS.
> the humerus is the longest of the bones of the upper limb.

"Bone number one" in Klingon is just {Hom wa'}. You aren't labeling
the number; you're labeling the bone.

I don't think the {-Daq} suffix works here. Your English even says
"bones of the upper limb", which in Klingon is just a noun-noun
construction: {DeS HomDu'}. I'm assuming "upper limb" means "arm",
though what you wrote was {'uS} "leg".

We have an example of this kind of phrasing in a line from Star Trek
V: {qIbDaq SuvwI' SoH Dun law' Hoch Dun puS} "You would be the
greatest warrior in the Galaxy." Following that pattern, your meaning
would be carried by {DeS HomDu''e' Hom wa' tIq law' Hoch tIq puS}
"Bone one is the longest of the arm bones."

> moQ rur (Hom mI' wa') (volchaH 'er'In) 'ej ro (Hom mI' wa') je muvmeH potlh.
> it's proximal end resembles a sphere, and its main significance is
> articulating the humerus with the trunk.

I can't follow the Klingon, sorry. I have exhausted my willingness to
try to read through the parentheses and work out the grammar you're
trying to use. At this point, I'd just be translating the English for
you instead of giving helpful advice on how to write it more clearly.
I get the impression that you're trying to take a shortcut by
translating the words instead of the ideas, but that might just be
because I am unfamiliar with the topic and I don't recognize the idea
from the words you're using.

> (Hom mI' wa') muvwI' Daq wa'DIch lupongmeH, mu' {nach} lu'lo' Qel
> in order to identify the proximal articulating area of the humerus,
> doctors use the word "head".

I don't see where {muvwI' Daq wa'DIch} came from. Is it referring to
the {moQ} mentioned in the previous sentence? If so, this could be
much simpler:
{moQvaD nach lupong Qel} "Doctors call the sphere a head."

> 'ej lupongmeH mI' {wa'} lulo' ghIv HaqwI''e'.
> and the orthopaedic surgeons use the number one.

Is this a different "one" from what you already told us? I didn't
think "orthopedic" was restricted to arms and legs; am I wrong?

> (Hom mI' wa') nach Sumbogh Daq jeq cha' Daq :
> near the humeral head protrude two areas :

It took me a while to figure out what you're doing with {Sum}. It
doesn't have the kind of "be close (to something)" meaning you are
trying to use. It is a verb of quality like {tIq} or {'ugh}. The thing
which is nearby is the subject of the verb, and there is no object.

You could say {nachDaq Sum cha' jeqwI'} "At the head, two protruders
are nearby." Since only one {nach} has been mentioned, being more
specific is unnecessary. Or you could use the noun {retlh} "area
nearby" instead of the verb {Sum} "be nearby": {nach retlhDaq jeq cha'
'ay'} "Two sections protrude at the area beside the head."

> jeqwI''a' jeqHom je.
> the greater and the lesser tuberosity.
>
> jeqwI''a' jeqHom je jojDaq taw jaQ tu'lu'.
> between the tuberosities lies a deep sulcus.

I have never encountered the word "sulcus" before, but I'm pretty sure
{taw} "road, street" doesn't fit. Do you know the word {Qargh}
"fissure"?

> intertubercular groove 'oH tera' pongDaj'e'.
> its terran name is intertubercular groove.
>
> tawvamDaq, (Hom mI' wa'maH wa') (ro HurDaq 'oHtaHbogh Hom mI' cha') je
> rarbogh Somraw to'waQ tu'lu'.
> this groove is occupied by the bicipital tendon.

"On this street, one finds muscle ligament which connects bone number
number eleven and bone number number two which is being in the torso's
exterior."

With the exception of the extraneous word {mI'}, this makes sense as a
sentence. The new bones are a surprise, and I have no idea which ones
those numbers represent, but that's just a matter of my own ignorance.
Is there a reason you specified "muscle tendon" instead of simply
calling it {to'waQ} alone? I'm not trained in anatomy, but if it's a
tendon as opposed to a ligament, shouldn't it be connecting a muscle
instead of two bones? I'm mostly concerned with the {ro HurDaq},
though. I have no idea what that "bone two outside the torso"
represents.

> nach jeqwI'Du' je jojDaq, (Hom mI' wa') Qur mong tu'lu'.
> between the head and the tuberosities lies the anatomical neck.
>
> 'ej jeqwI'Du' bIngDaq Haq mong tu'lu'.
> and below the tuberosities lies the surgical neck.

The distinction between {Qur mong} and {Haq mong}.is interesting, and
the choice of words is well done (though I don't know nearly enough to
be able to judge *how* well).


This is highly technical stuff. If you're writing for someone already
trained in the subject, the complexity might be appropriate. But for
"regular people" who happen to speak Klingon, you should probably work
on making the reader's task easier by using simpler phrasing and by
taking advantage of context to remove unnecessary wordiness. If subtle
differences between {Hom to'waQ} and {Somraw to'waQ} are really
important, go ahead and keep them, but if that level of detail isn't
required you can safely ignore the slight lack of precision.

-- ghunchu'wI'