<html><head><meta http-equiv="content-type" content="text/html; charset=utf-8"></head><body dir="auto"><div></div><div>Thanks, QeS 'utlh; this is very helpful. I have a few questions/comments:</div><div><br>On Jun 12, 2018, at 00:07, Rhona Fenwick <<a href="mailto:qeslagh@hotmail.com">qeslagh@hotmail.com</a>> wrote:<br><br></div><blockquote type="cite"><div><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr">
<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">For my part, I think {Hu' puS ram} works perfectly well for "a few nights ago"; it carries an implication of recency that {'opHu' ram} doesn't, but whether that's a problem or not is entirely up to you.</p>
<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><br></p></div></div></blockquote><div><br></div><div>Okay, cool. I had already changed it to 'opHu' ram based on ghunchu'wI'’s suggestion, but since recency is part of my intended meaning, I think I’ll go back to Hu' puS ram, as long as it doesn’t break any rules, and is easily understood. I can see how 'opHu' might refer to a large number of days ago.</div><br><blockquote type="cite"><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr"><p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">I don't think an imperative can be the complement of an {'e'} construction like this. Safer would be
</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;">{julwIj wov DatlhapQo' 'e' vItlhob}. </span></p></div></blockquote><div><br></div><div>Okay, qay'be', but if it’s no longer an imperative, should it be Datlhapbe' instead? I’m pleading that you do not remove my bright sun, not that you refuse to remove it.</div><br><blockquote type="cite"><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr">
<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">While {nej} "look for" works okay here, for your meaning of "if you find another", {Sam} "find, locate" is better. </span></p></div></blockquote><div><br></div><div>Thank you again. You are right, I did mean Sam here. I get those two mixed up still, and usually I use the qeylIS prayer from Discovery to sort them out; I must not have done that this time.</div><br><blockquote type="cite"><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr"><p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><br>
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">> chomuSHa'qu' 'e' wa'logh Daja'pu',</p>
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">According to TKD, {'e'} as an object should come after {wa'logh} as an adverbial. The sole canon counterexample, as ghunchu'wI' points out, is problematic in other ways, though I suppose it at least allows an argument
based on poetic licence.</p>
<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><br></p></div></blockquote><div><br></div><div>Do you mind sharing the counterexample, if it’s not too much trouble, and explaining how it’s problematic? I think I can change this to:</div><div><br></div><div>chomuSHa' wa'logh 'e' Daja'qangpu'</div><div><br></div><div>The shift in meaning departs a bit from the Terran version, but this relationship seems pretty asymmetrical, and it’s consistent with that.</div><br><blockquote type="cite"><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr"><p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><span style="font-size: 12pt;">According to the rule of {rom}, here {jIqeHHa'} should be {vIqeHHa'} to agree with the object {Hoch}. I've noticed this in a couple of your subsequent translations too - be sure you keep your eye not only on subject-agreement,
but also on object-agreement.</span></p>
<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><br></p></div></blockquote><div><br></div><div>Indeed. I still struggle with DIp moHaq rom when it comes to objects. I noticed a wI- that should have been DI- in HovHom, HovHom. I’ll try to proofread better; thanks.</div><br><blockquote type="cite"><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr"><p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">Overall, though, majQa'. I'm impressed. Have you considered having a poke at a rhyming translation?<br>
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0"><br></p></div></blockquote><div><br></div><div>Thank you very much, and I appreciate the feedback. I’m not certain what you mean by a rhyming translation: could you please elaborate?</div><br><blockquote type="cite"><div id="divtagdefaultwrapper" style="font-size: 12pt; color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: Calibri, Helvetica, sans-serif, "EmojiFont", "Apple Color Emoji", "Segoe UI Emoji", NotoColorEmoji, "Segoe UI Symbol", "Android Emoji", EmojiSymbols;" dir="ltr"><p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">
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<p style="margin-top:0;margin-bottom:0">QeS 'utlh<br>
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