[tlhIngan Hol] Project failed

Will Martin lojmitti7wi7nuv at gmail.com
Tue Jan 16 15:14:48 PST 2024


So…

I ignorantly took on a self-assigned translation project that I found initially fascinating. I was going to call it, “On the Nature of the Nature of Things.” Here’s the dedication:

Stephen Greenblatt wrote The Swerve, an excellent book about the discovery and preservation of the ancient Latin poem by Lucretius entitled On the Nature of Things. This ancient work was based upon the works of the even more ancient Greek philosopher named Epicurus. 

No surviving works by Epicurus have been discovered, but I have recently stumbled upon the works of an even more ancient Klingon philosopher named Suyru’qIp’e’, whom, through the use of AI I have managed to determine, was the original source of the ideas upon which Epicurus’s works were based.

Epicurus was the translator, not the author.

And so, what has been heretofore referred to as the “humanist” movement in philosophy, is actually a derived work from the original “klingonist” philosophical root.


Then… I got an actual English translation from the Latin of “On the Nature of Things” by Lucretius…

The first paragraph is 71 lines long, worshiping Venus and sounding somewhat jealous of Mars, describing him in sensual detail that may very well cross the boundary into the homo-erotic… leaving me with the sense that Lucretius was probably bi and perhaps seriously into hallucinogenic mushrooms.

Okay, an example of one sentence grabbed arbitrarily from that paragraph: "For soon as the vernal aspect of day is disclosed, and the birth-favoring breeze of Favonius unbarred is blowing fresh, first the fowls of the air, O lady, show signs of thee and thy entering in, throughly smitten in heart by thy power."

I…

… can’t…

… breathe…

Okay, so maybe this WASN’T such a great idea. It just seemed SO COOL.

Then again, I am SO LAZY, in terms of realizing dreams.

Anyway, maybe somebody here will at least enjoy the thought of what could have been.

pItlh

charghwI’ ‘utlh
(ghaH, ghaH, -Daj)




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